Slow down, the world isn't watching us break down
It's safe to say we are alone now, we're alone now
Not a whisper, the only noise is the receiver
I'm counting the seconds until you break the silence
So please just break the silence
The whispers turn to shouting
The shouting turns to tears
Your tears turn into laughter
And it takes away our fears
So you see, this world doesn't matter to me
I'll give up all I have just to breathe
The same air as you till the day that I die
I can't take my eyes off of you
I'm longing, for words to describe how I'm feeling
I'm feeling inspired
My world just flip turned upside down, and turned around
Say what's that sound
It's my heart beat, this couldn't be better
My heart beat, is stronger than ever
I'm feeling so alive, I'm feeling so alive
The whispers turn to shouting
The shouting turns to tears
Your tears turn into laughter
And it takes away our fears
So you see, this world doesn't matter to me
I'll give up all I have just to breathe
The same air as you till the day that I die
I can't take my eyes off of you
I'm finally waking up, a twist in my story
It's time I open up, and let your love right through me
I'm finally waking up, a twist in my story
It's time I open up, and let your love right through me
Cause that's what you get
When you see your life through someone else's eyes
That's what you get, that's what you get
So you see, this world doesn't matter to me
I'll give up all I have just to breathe
The same air as you till the day that I die
I can't take my eyes off of you
So you see, this world doesn't matter to me
I'll give up all I have just to breathe
The same air as you till the day that I die
I can't take my eyes off of you
♥ twist in my story by Secondhand Serenade
I have given up being in love! The days have all gone by, and my heart has lost the need to have one. I can't feel what i feel from a guy before.. Heart-breaking news i know.. Well, it's ok.. I'm happier now.. Single and Solo.. Free to do whatever i want.. Hahas! 
Life for me has changed since i broke up.. I have forgotten bout what others care.. Hahas, why should i ?? Well, i should.. Hahas.. I wouldn't want to lose any companions because for not caring! WEll, i'm trying to regain the old rabiahtul that is far far far away from where i am.. 
The person i am now is just temporary.. Hahas.. I wouldn't give a damn if i still stay like this.. Like i said, i'm much more happier.. Love has made me weaker and i can just fall apart anytime.. Being out of it, i feel relieved and stronger.. In relationships, i sometimes feel like i belong to someone, but somehow, i still belong to me no matter what.. The right guy isn't here yet, in my life, making a huge different! 
What different should he make?? I don't know.. Maybe he changed me into a better person, without realising it.. SOmeone who open my eyes so that i can see the things that are obvious in front of me though i can't just see it.. Someone who can make me smile, cry and then laughed again.. Someone who knows when i'm gonna blast off and someone who understands me well.. 
Well, every girls always dream of their prince charming being in the HOT categories.. WEll, sometimes, to me, fairy tales doesn't just end like that.. A snap and boom, the whole world become a better place! Well, i may never know, the guy i always wanted is somewhat hard to find these days, but if i search and connected well, hmm.. aint got a prob sweeties! WEll, i may just never know.. 
What is the guy i want and dreamed about is just someone who comes and leaves my life, like a hotel.. He checks in fresh and ready, he went into the room messed it all up and then leave the hotel..
When he gets back, the hotel room was all cleaned up.. The room service was great and fast.. He became addicted to it and found it fun.. Soo, he does that again.. Messed up the room and leave!
Again when he came back to his room, he found the room all cleaned up, fresh but somehow, he gets tired and bored of doing the same thing, knowing that at the end of the day, the room is gonna be cleaned
Soo, he checked out and left for another hotel..
The story of that guy is actually a the way i see.. The room is somehow my heart.. He messed my heart and well, left.. Leaving me all untidy and depressing.. But, when he returned to me again, i was as fresh as a newly cleaned room.. Well, he came back into my life, ruining me again.. Breaking my heart and left me like he did before, and came back once more, knowing that i'm gonna be ok.. But, when he came back to me, he just realised that this whole thing is getting boring and he's getting bored of me.. Soo, the sight of me/the room is somewhat BORING to him.. It isn't something special anymore.. It's just a room, or It's just a person..
Well, in the end, he just left me for another girl.. 
I just never know.. Maybe the right guy isn't the one i have been dreaming about.. Maybe there's a thing or two i don't really like about him, but HEY!! We're humans babe! We're imperfect and everyone has flaws.. Soo, maybe the thing i may not like bout him is the REASON why i want to be with him.. Maybe he likes rock music and sings horribly, and i hate it DAMN much! But, when he sang to me, it may come straight from the heart.. Maybe i wouldn't notice it because of his horrible voice, but maybe one day, when he's away, the thing i missed bout him isn't the thing i loved bout him.. It's the things that i HATE bout him.. He made me irritated and somehow, i missed that! Hahas! 
Why have i given up on love? Why can't i just go out, find a guy, maybe someone who matches my wants and be in a relationship.. I can.. But i don't want to.. Short relationships are hard.. Maybe at first i may not love that guy really much, but as time goes by, the love gets stronger.. But in the end, it just ended like a good movie with a bad ending! hahas..
Why again.. Well, the truth is.. There's this guy i have known for around 6 years, plus this year, if im not wrong! Pardon me yeapp! I don't keep track of time and people! Well, he's sweet and cute.. He's funny and LOUD! He's always laughing and smiling.. But that was him, years back.. The teenage him, now, is somewhat the mystery.. I can't really get him much.. He's like a really hard puzzle that i really need to find time to really really do it.. A missing peace and the whole picture is DESTROYED.. 
He changes as time goes by.. The old him have somewhat, gone.. Maybe there's a little teeny bit of it in him, but maybe, it's too teeny that it feels like it doesn't exist anymore.. I don't know.. The old him is sweet and all those i mentioned.. But the TEenage and grown up him.. He's just different.. 
Yes, we seldom talk.. And Hell yeah, i LOVe looking at him work.. Well, seriously, the crush i have for him all these years is still strong in my heart.. Somewhere in my heart, his name and image can't be forgotten.. Yes he may or may not even KNOW me, or LIKE me.. I wouldn't care.. Like i said, i'm in NO mood to LOVe again.. 
Well, except he made an exception. hahas.. maybe, if he really is in my life after years of wishing it..-well, he is already in my life, umm.. i asked him to be my GOOD GOOD fren... But somehow, we treated each other like Strangers! Soo, a few days back,i emailed him to ask him to choose whether we're cool or not.. Cos we just never Ever really communicate.. - Well, he is SOMEWHAT in my life.. But not officially i guess.. I somehow know that he doesn't like me.. It's ok.. 
Everyone gets rejected in their life.. It doesn't matter how, that's just the way life is.. Must at least something that we wanted most, or not, but well, this makes us work and live and grow stronger.. And makes us work harder to reach that goal that we had just been rejected! Love life, work and all sorts..
Well, im already used to REJECTIONS.. I'm not afraid to say it out loud.. let the world hear.. cos I'm just like you and you're just like me.. But somehow, i grew stronger, learned from my mistake and maybe try to make it better.. It may not be much, but it's something..
WEll, this guy as i was saying, i don't think he wants me in his life.. I Can be a BURDEN in his life, i guess. Well, i know i can be irritating at times and also very very Kepo... Hahas.. Well, i care for my friends, and i guess, that's the way things work out for me.. You may or may not like it.. Well, it's my style.. You have yours soo, stick with with it.. WEll, i don't think I'm ever the perfect girl for Mr. Z! hahas, maybe he's just out of my league.. Or wait.. I'm never his type.. Hahas..
Well, if you're reading this, my friend, tell me how you really feel bout all these.. I really do want to know, cos i really do like you all these while.. Well, a NO is never as bad as anything else.. It may feel like a knife being stabbed at my heart, but every cuts get heal in the future.. It may or not leave a mark but sometimes, it's a wake up call or a reminder.. 
A reminder for me to remember, i have been hurt before, and i've overcome it.. It's not easy but it's ok.. I may get hurt again, but no one ever knows.. I become stronger and stronger..
There;s a little hope on love for me.. I may just ignored it, push it to the back of my mind, letting it blend with the other things and feelings that i wish never existed in me, or just have a little faith that one day, MAYBE a man, changes all these and made me realised that i was wrong.. But again, this is what i see.. From deep down my heart and soul.. It may be nonsense to all you peps but somehow, whatever you think may not be what i really do LIKE!
I have learnt alot and yet i know a little.. Love has taught me alot, but somehow i know sooo little.. Well, i'm still saving the first kiss, the kiss that i want to give to the person whom i love.. The First Kiss... Should be with a guy i like, not any random guys! hahas!
WEll, call me loser or old fashion, Ketinggalan zaman or watever you want.. But i'm proud that i'm saving it for the Right person.. Laugh at me.. Point your finger at me and laugh out loud madly.. You're just making a fool of yourself laughing at me. Sad for you.. *Pointing and laughing at you!*
Hahas!!! Just joking babe!! hahas!!
Well, i want to do my POA homework now.. Life is soo much full of homeworks.. Hmmm.. What should i write in my next post.. Keep me posted with some ideas.. I was thinking of.... Growing up!
Hahas!! Lame but FUCK OFF!! My blog, you tell me. Hahas! Sorry... It gets weirder each time... Hahas! WEll, Good luck to you people out there and GOOD LUCK TO ME , MYSELF and I! Hahas!!
Humming a love song,
Written by one in love
The words make my heart jump
Yet the right feeling ain't there yet..
Sharing my love with no one,
I smile and laugh..
There's many people around me
That i can share my love with...
Rabbit Sayang You all out THERE! Without you guys, i don't think i can survive most of my "Adventures and Miserable" quest finding the old me.. Thankx mostly to my 3 girlfriends!!
Radhiah Elfira Theresa
These are my girls, soo back off jerks!!! Hahas!!
Well, try my best to come up with a great subject tomorrow.. Hahas!!
Chill and Buaiii!!
Rabbiahhtull Addawiyahh Tayy!
Wiiyahh Tayy~!
RabbiT~Tay!
dead_rox!!
I'm just me even though i am known as all those..
Wiyah still hoping that he can somehow come into her life,
Brighten up the dark room,
With love and happiness,
But even if it didn't come true,
Her eyes are very well comfotable with the dark dark room,
Where all darkness conquers her life and soul..
But, he can make a difference..
A smile and a laughter,
can just pull her back,
To the place she once called HOME!~herself...............
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Monday, January 19, 2009
3:27 PM